Ladies' Night

Zombie 1: I want to quit my job.

Zombie 2: What’s wrong? Did you just reach home? Had dinner?

Zombie 1: I had a slab of Ice cream. Kwality Walls. Family pack.

Zombie 2: That’s unhealthy. Didn’t you have a cheese burst pizza last night?

Zombie 1: Yeah well it was too late. And I just felt like. They don’t give us food here in the paying guest accommodation.

Zombie 2: You sound like you’re in jail.

Zombie 1: Huh! Ha ha!

Zombie 2: Okay chill man.. I get it.

Zombie 1: Listen I can’t take it anymore yaar. I just want to run away.

Zombie 2: You can run, you can hide, but.. oh God I miss him.

Zombie 1: Enrique?

Zombie 2: Very funny. You know who I’m talking about.

Zombie 1: Of course. It’s just that I thought this was about me. For a change.

Zombie 2: Yeah it was. But then I got carried away with the song.

Zombie 1: Hmm. You know what, let’s play a game. Let’s find something that doesn’t remind you of him, okay?

Zombie 2: Okay. I doubt whether it’s going to work. But, whatever.. go ahead.

Zombie 1: Tomatoes.

Zombie 2: Oh no we diced those together. Erm no actually I just watched. He diced.

Zombie 1: Potatoes.

Zombie 2: We ate.

Zombie 1: Cobwebs?

Zombie 2: Cobwebs remind me of walls. And I can totally picture him sitting next to a wall.

Zombie 1: Apples.

Zombie 2: Food is a bad idea I guess. Try something else. We passed an apple cart once.

Zombie 1: Water heater?

Zombie 2: Umm.. well he must have used one. Oh no wait he had a geyser. So then..

Zombie 1: Water heater 1.. water heater 2.. water heater 3..

Zombie 2: Shush.. wait man.. by water heater do you mean that electric immersion rod because technically a geyser is also a..

Zombie 1: Nope. I did it. Yes! Water heater it is!

Zombie 2: Cool. So that calls for celebration you know. Don’t quit.

Zombie 1: That doesn’t help. You don’t know how it is..

Zombie 2: Look. Just go take a bath ok? And not with a bucket and a mug and all that crap. Go take a shower. Let it drench you. Just be lazy.

Zombie 1: I can’t believe you said that. You’re such a sweetheart.

Zombie 2: Yes, I know. And next weekend we are gonna watch porn. American Pie. The whole series.

Zombie 1: Is that your idea of porn?

Zombie 2: Fine. Let’s just get married instead.

Zombie 1: I.. what? That’s not even kind of funny.

Zombie 2: Next weekend. We either watch my kind of porn or we get married.

Zombie 1: Or I run away to my hometown.

Zombie 2: Ha!

Zombie 1: Forget it. Who am I kidding? I’ll be working next Saturday. Monday we have a presentation. So I’ll be working on Sunday as well! You think I should just kill myself or go missing?

Zombie 2: Oh no don’t go absconding. Remember he tried that once and then...

Zombie 1: No no no water heater water heater WATER HEATER!!!