Tuesday, May 11, 2010

There was Mint in my Broth today

Jofin Jose from Kolkata has left me some clues. He’s the guy who requested back-to-back classics on VH1 – “Let it be” by the Beatles and “Summer of ‘69” by Bryan Adams. Now what could possibly be the connection between the two?

Times gone by? “Jofin Jose from Kolkata” should have sufficed in that case.

I’m sorry. I’m in a foul, foul mood tonight. I love Kolkata. Would have loved it more if it was right next to Delhi. I wish I could sleep in Delhi and wake up in Kolkata and not vice versa. Actually it’s not vice versa. I sleep and wake up in Delhi. I just really wanted to use vice versa in my sentences. The point is I really want to go but I don’t think I would be able to. Hence the destination sucks.

You know I think I am going to turn into Charlie Sheen’s cynic of a character from Two and a half Men. You know why? Because I have been trying really, really hard not to turn into the dork who plays his brother on the show. The twice divorced chiropractor who shares custody of a slob of a son with his first ex-wife. Alan. He’s neat and clean and his internal organs are in excellent condition, thanks to stuff like acidophilus milk. As if that isn’t scary enough, he talked like me today. I swear to God. His brother accused him of something and in his defence he shrugs and stutters and says “That’s not the point.” I messaged that to a friend yesterday! So there you are: I shared dialogues with a dufus. Tomorrow it’s going to be too late and I’ll discover that we share personalities.

And you know this isn’t the first time I struck a chord with the dead or the dying. Remember Brittany Murphy? Look up. She’s in the photograph. Actually if you kept looking up, you might see her in heaven. Getting sloshed. But cheering up the winged bozos. I miss her. It isn’t everyday that a girl that you’ve only seen on TV dies. So it was this movie, The Ramen Girl and suddenly she says “I’d rather be here with you”. Okay I know mine was a lot more emotional and elaborate but dude that’s MY LINE!!!

No, it’s a nice movie actually. Her movies generally are. Were.

Dad just came back home. It’s 1:00am. Oh to be in your fifties and stay up late in office. There’s a nightmare only Santa Claus has had I guess. Recurring, too. Poor thing. Only Dad didn’t use the chimney. Good. I’m the one on fire tonight. Oh and Lalit Modi, the IPL guy, got fired.

Dad was out, plucking flowers. He brought one home. Oh, among other things. Duh!

I don’t quite know why I went for the “ogre-licious” McDonald’s soft serve today. They have a huge green poster of Shrek outside the Kamlanagar outlet and the docile, demure McMen and McWomen inside were wearing it on their heads. Well, if they were going so far. It’s a small white swirl in a cup with a green translucent gel layered around the edges. Mint. And then on my way back, mint again. This time in the Metro compartment. The one in the morning wasn’t mint, maybe. That was just toothpaste.

You know what other songs Jofin Jose requested today? “Numb” by Jay Z and Linkin Park. “Rockstar” by Nickelback. “Brighter than Sunshine” by Aqualung, original soundtrack from “A Lot Like Love”.

The lead pair in Castle are Richard Castle (Crime fiction novelist) and Detective Kate Beckett (New York Police Department). Didn’t Satyajit Ray find the formula decades ago, in Lalmohan Ganguly (alias Jatayu) and Pradosh C. Mitter (alias Feluda)? Of course, Feluda didn’t wear high heels and Jatayu wasn’t so hot.

“They don’t take you to the Vet. You’re obviously not their favourite pet. Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat... it’s not your fault.” Nothing. I’ve just been humming that song. Let’s just call it the spirit of the Ramen. The broth would be bland without it.

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